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Best Bites. My Recipes. This is us 2 minutes after the number of kids we were responsible went from 2 to 4. I took it for granted that our children would be healthy and that their births would by trouble free.

Thank you all lovely people. Teething is now in full effect and the girls want us to know all about it. An email would have sufficed but it seems they'd rather use their voices to get the message across that they really aren't enjoying this stage of development.

Its not straight screaming, it's more like the sound a wounded animal might make that just wants to end it all. I can't blame them though, it's like a mini scene from 'Alien' in there at the moment, just in very very slow motion and of course teeth don't then go on to kill you and the crew of your ship so a few subtle differences but essentially the same.

Developed a New product this evening - child shoes. They cost a fortune, stop you from achieving anything, age you dramatically, are never clean despite washing them regularly and never go in the direction you ask them to.

Come to think about it, these sound terrible. Back to the drawing board After long day of walking around and playing, The twins needed a bath and I needed a wash so day 2 of dadtakeover ended like this.

I dont run baths just for myself I'm a man after all. In theory this sharing of a bath was a good idea. In reality it felt like I was an uninvited blue whale who'd gatecrashed a private spa for small people.

If looks from babies could kill, I'd have been dead for sure. Strategically placed flannels were used in the taking of this picture.

And yes I took the picture on a tripod before people ask! Im on my own! On to day 3. If there is one thing that us dads are good for its being used as a mobile human climbing frame.

We're practicing our routine for britain's got talent, the talent being how many family members can hang off me kind of a real life buckaroo game before I slip a disc and crumple into a pathetic mess crying like a child who's grazed their knee for the first time.

Come see us on the BGT tour next year. Should I get offended that when I'm in charge of dressing the girls, instead of being given free rein to 'get creative' and use my couture fashion eye to create a 'wow' outfit that will catch the eye and imagination, I walk into their room and find that all the clothes are laid out already.

Granted I have a tendency to dress them as boys, and will invariably forget the importance of layers, and that spots and strips clash, and that socks are essential, and that a baby grow doesn't count as day wear, and that I dress them the same, i cant tell them apart for the rest if the day, but surely if you give me a chance, the law of averages will mean I'll get it right one day!

Someone call crime watch! I took this picture of a guy getting mugged in broad day light today. The 2 confidence tricksters are known in the local area and ply their trade by pretending to love their victims and then, when their guard is down, scratching their faces to pieces, pulling their hair and dribbling on them until they are given milk or rice cakes.

The suspects are described as looking exactly the same, to the degree that their father cant tell them apart.

They are around 2. Some previous victims had said they smell like a childrens play centre toilets but that has yet to be confirmed.

The one on the left is like, "sis I told you I smush the right eye, you smush the left". Some hand-me-downs, some brand new. We offer up the hand made, ethically sourced, non toxic, bespoke blocks made from organic, carbon offset wood, lovingly sourced from Norway.

They look down their nose at them with disgust, decide they're tosh and toss them to one side. Then they go on a rampage to find keys, my wallet, my phone, anything that resembles a remote control and plastic packaging.

If that fails, they bug me until i give up the goods. These two have been round my ankles all day, literally.

I've been walking around as if there's broken glass on the floor to avoid stepping on them no one wants to hear that cry you get when you accidentally tread on a small hand that's not where it should be - that's the point when you give yourself the 'shittest parent of the day' award.

At least they do a good job of cleaning the floors, I should put Polish down and strap a rag to their stomachs. Might as well get them to pull their weight from an early age.

FYI the tiles are from best tile UK. Encaustic Moroccan cement tiles. The wonders of modern technology. Why, oh why did I give my eldest an ipod touch?

Yes, its great to stay in contact while im away but my inbox is now full of emoji based spam from my bored daughter.

The emoji poo is a firm favourite. Today while in meetings, I convinced her that because I'm 8 hours ahead of her I. Took her a while to figure out that wasn't actually the case, made me laugh though!

Why does bathtime always involve cramming as many family members into one of the smallest rooms in the house at the same time?

I guess the eldest 2 like it as it's like a cheap version of the sea life centre. They get to watch these weird pink slippery things splash about and generally contort themselves out of these chairs while sucking the life out of some sponges.

Clemmie and I are there just play life guards and crowd control. I should charge admission. Actually, forget it - Health and safety would definitely shut us done.

Last night - "Oh daddy, remember to make our woodland themed costumes for school tomorrow! They were woodland fairies FYI.

That's a pretty clever and creative idea, using wire hangers and plastic film to make wings. You're an awesome dad. What do you get if you cross claires accessories with 4 girls, 2 of whom who have just drank a coke, and a tired dad?

There's just too many of them, you get one and the other sods off to hide in the hair bands - I can hear the giggling, I just can't see them through the haze of pink and sparkles.

At least i found the tiara i was after. I look Bangin'! I remember my husband getting his hair and nails done by our girls. And we only have two!!!!

Another monday, another last minute rush to the shops to avoid the armageddon I. I basically live in this aisle of the supermarket now. New parents seem to gravitate to me as an "experienced parent" i.

Wow, you're an ungrateful bitch. What did you want him to do? Punch the guy in the face and get charged with assault? Because the cops aren't gonna arrest a coach slapping a girl's ass, they're gonna arrest the dad who punched the coach.

Also, in a small town turning in a local celebrity is more likely to get you thrown in jail than them. I know a guy that got away with rape several times because people kept turning him in to his DPS buddies.

It's so easy for people to say what should have been done from behind their computer. Real life has consciences, you have to be tactful or you'll just make a scene and look like an ass, letting the bad guy win.

Sounds to me like he did things the smart way. In my town people can be too touchy but only the sickos defend their right to keep being grabby.

Obviously he doesn't have a well-working conscience. Then he should of immediately stepped in straight away. Not on my watch. Fuck off you troll, go to some other sewers.

Im sure you got them mapped out you piece of shit. I don't see how you think hes not a "hero", its hero-eligible with him turning the douche-bag in, a man doesn't spread rumors like a high school brat.

I think he didn't do much about the man tapping his kids ass because the man was gonna get something much worse, having to pay 80 grand to the FBI as well as getting a 2 year sentence, so the man got what he deserved about tapping her ass.

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Follow us on Flipboard. This lazy panda forgot to write something about itself. I agree. I mean, the story is cool, but it isn't the type of content that I was looking for when I started to follow the page.

I remember when BP was all about art, so cool and nothing was so much mainstream! And nothing was "going v.

Totally agree! Why does BP need to pull stuff like that from Reddit? Leave Reddit to Reddit and go back to the authentic BP stuff.

Totally agree with L and P. You won't believe what this father did as revenge when the coach sexually harassed his daughter, and the whole internet goes into a frenzy over it!

Yet the internet keeps making those things go viral. Not only can the internet stand it, it'S the very reason you're hearing about it now. Maybe I just don't get it?

I thought Bored Panda was a universal medium for all things diverse. You know - a window to the world outside our windows?

But it's not once in a while. I see stories only like this on BP. BP is reallllllllly losing itself.. This comment is hidden. Click here to view.

I'd suggest to split Bored Panda into "Bored Panda art and cool stuff", "Bored Panda viral bullshit stories" and "Bored Panda political correctness and snowflake culture".

Peta you've missed the point. No one is saying the arse slapping was ok. What everyone is saying including Hugo, is this used to be an art site.

We didn't follow BoredPanda to read these stories. Maybe it is time to unfollow BoredPanda if this is the direction they are going. So you think it was ok for some old perv to slap little girl's on the arse?

Well,considering the only people who complain about "Political Correctness"and "Snowflakes" wanna throw a "Sheeple" or "Butthurt" in there for good measure?

Yeah you probably think it's just fine. I agree Cassiel, not so much revenge as doing the right thing! That's a fact.

It is dumb people actually believe that part of the story. Which means, how much of the rest is true. FBI got involve Way to go - you let a grown man touch your teenage daughter and get away with a talking to and a head shake.

You knew he was stealing from kids for years but didn't turn him in until it suited you. I'm struggling with how you're the hero here.

You only did the right thing when you felt you would benefit. I'm completely with you. I was confused, so I read the whole thing like 5 times.

How is that man a hero?! Hero's people throw that word round so much It's cheap any more. We are going to need to find another word for the Men, Women, ect.

I read it over and over and thought "where is the hero"? Shouldn't he had done the right thing from the start? He stopped this creep stealing but most of all he stopped him touching YOUR daughter well done I say.

Wow, you're an ungrateful bitch. What did you want him to do? Punch the guy in the face and get charged with assault? Because the cops aren't gonna arrest a coach slapping a girl's ass, they're gonna arrest the dad who punched the coach.

Also, in a small town turning in a local celebrity is more likely to get you thrown in jail than them. I know a guy that got away with rape several times because people kept turning him in to his DPS buddies.

It's so easy for people to say what should have been done from behind their computer. Real life has consciences, you have to be tactful or you'll just make a scene and look like an ass, letting the bad guy win.

Sounds to me like he did things the smart way. In my town people can be too touchy but only the sickos defend their right to keep being grabby.

Obviously he doesn't have a well-working conscience. Then he should of immediately stepped in straight away. Not on my watch. Fuck off you troll, go to some other sewers.

Im sure you got them mapped out you piece of shit. I don't see how you think hes not a "hero", its hero-eligible with him turning the douche-bag in, a man doesn't spread rumors like a high school brat.

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